I’ve realized that over the course of five years being married to Niki, that I’ve been in a codependent relationship. An unhealthy environment for the entire family. Her kids and I all have a pattern of avoiding conflict with Niki. We tend to apologize or even take blame just to keep the peace in the home. Niki is very disrespectful to our marriage in the way she acts as a single woman and just dismisses these things as being normal and in her words, “don’t get so butthurt about it.” – I’m not supposed to be upset that she is texting other men (who she dated), to come stay the night with them. I’m not supposed to be upset that she lies about where she is at 3:30 am (supposed to be at work but is at a bar with another man.) I’m not supposed to remember that she has cheated on me. I am not putting her down, I just feel like I’m in a high school relationship vs what should be a partnership when married.